Ugh...Palin

So I thought I would try to keep this blog apolitical, but since really only about three people read it I don't think it's that big of a deal. Basically I need to whine about this Palin woman. Anyone that knows me or reads my Facebook status knows I can't stand her. She is the epitome of a woman who has used and abused feminism and its ideals only to CRAP on the progress women have fought long and hard to make.

Gloria Steinem and Suheir Hammad wrote an article about feminism that described feminists as, "women who actively promote the advancement of the interests of other women, not just the narcissistic advancement of themselves." It could not have been stated any better. Palin is the definition of a woman who promotes the "narcissistic advancement of herself." The woman is unbelievable. She claims family values and God and Jesus and the like when her 17 year old is knocked up! Judgemental...oh hell yes and I am okay with that. It's not good for 17 year olds to be having babies...sorry, it's just not.

I am not sure why women seem to see her as a role model. She seems to be just playing in the boys club, but telling the public she's a "maverick." Please. She's transparent and blatantly self interested to me. In addition to these things she does not seem intelligent enough to handle the job that she could potentially be elected for. I mean really, don't we deserve a vice president that knows where Iraq is! Perhaps that is a gross overstatement...maybe she did know where Iraq was before her two month cram session, but I would bet money that she did not.

Okay rant over. Perhaps besides her clear lack of knowledge there's no substantial reason not to put her in office, but at any rate she is a disappointment to women and I don't care that she is a governor or has been mayor of a small town. I suppose on some level progress is progress, but I think it's morally questionable when you try to rip down the rights of the very people that got you to your position in the first place.

I refuse to put a photo of this twit up, so instead I will put up a photo of a guilty puppy...the way she should feel about the idea of being elected vice president.

Newyorkification

I have been in New York going on four years now, a long and short four years all at the same time. I am finally genuinely feeling at home and enjoying it. I feel like New York is a place that you will always love and hate. It takes some time to get used to subways, urine smells, hobos outside your apartment, creepy men constantly jeering at you, everything being crowded all of the time, I could go on, but I will stop. There comes a time (for me it was about three years) when you just come to accept these things as "New York," and you appreciate them for what they are.

I don't mean to hate on NYC, which I have done so many times in my years living here, there are myriad of amazing things about this city. For such a small island the city holds so much. I get why people say they never want to leave. There are the greatest museums, amazing restaurants, any interest group you could ever want, central park, and even more. It's sort of like the city you hate living in, but you love visiting so much you don't leave.

I feel like my newyorkification has really set in. I am voting for Obama, I have hit a cab (I hit a cab with my fist because it almost hit me. Yes, it did hurt), and I go to Starbucks at least once a day. I don't think my midwesterness will ever leave me, it still lurks beneath my tough exterior. I still wouldn't even call myself a "New Yorker," but I have embraced this city for what it is and I like it...finally.

From high fashion to WTF...fashion?

When does fashion go over the line? When does high fashion turn to huh? fashion? I don't consider myself to be too fashionable. It's too much to keep up with and I have better things to do like keep up with old episodes of "I love Money," I mean "The Hills," I mean...okay I don't watch any quality TV, but it's still more interesting to me then wearing Pucci (Yes, Pucci, not Gucci).

Today I saw this girl walking down the street and I'm not sure I would call her high fashion, but she was making a statement, however, it was a statement that should've been made in 1984. From her shoes to her hair it was straight out of Square Pegs. I know she was being fashionable and hipster-y, but honestly even the hair was permed! She had on a cloth tight skirt a totally 80's top and some white ankle boots...am I missing something or was this a bad idea?

I get mixing trends up, but I just feel like when you go hair to toes it's overkill. I suppose this is why I don't work on Fashion Ave...oh wait I do. Well, I don't work IN fashion and there's probably many good reasons for that. One being that they probably don't take too kindly to squirrel shirts (I have one and I wear it and I like it).

P.S. I feel as though half-naked Tom Selleck on a phone that isn't plugged in is a good representation of the 80's.

Awkward...

I decided that I would title this blog awkward to speak about my own horrible awkwardness. I like to think I am a sociable person. I am outgoing, I don't really get too nervous in situations with new people, and I would like to think I can work a room. However, lurking underneath that fantastic (yes, I said fantastic) exterior is an completely awkward, mildly insecure person.

Now don't get me wrong. I do think positive things about myself and I know I am smart and not hideous and all that jazz, but still I can't help but question myself most of the time. I am not afflicted with such issues all day every day, but it really comes up when I am in dating or near dating situations or situations that could turn into dates or dating associates or anything to do with men actually.

Whenever I like someone I act like a moron. I'm sure this is that uncommon, but usually I can hide my awkwardness so that people don't realize it until it's too late. What causes me to be such a strange girl you ask? I like to blame my upbringing or maybe my sister, but I think it's all me. I make bad or inappropriate jokes, I get anxiety, I talk incessantly (yes, more then usual) and I get robotic in my movement because I am thinking about it so much. I wish I could just be normal, but unfortunately I'm not sure that's in my cards.

Perhaps some people like awkward ladies? I like awkward boys...not sure why but I do. Maybe I will just start watching Bridget Jones Diary over and over again and again until I know exactly what I shouldn't be doing. Oh no! What if I am Bridget Jones but younger...Perhaps I should just start drinking heavily so that I am drunk whenever I meet people and then I don't worry about it? I'll take suggestions...or dates.

Straighting...

So last night I went out with some work friends. These events are typically a bit awkward because most of the time you don't want to be "sociable" with your coworkers outside of the painful 9 hours a day you already spend with them, but I digress.

So we're sitting around drinking and the guy sitting next to me keeps texting someone. I knew he didn't have a girlfriend, so I wondered who else could possibly be all up in his business. Me, being the hilarious person that I am, made the unique joke about his bestie being his girlfriend and he replied, "basically." Then he laughed and said "we're straighting." Little did my coworking friend know, but he just inspired one whole blog dedicated to his witty response.

After hearing this term I decided I was going to steal it, but since I'm not Biden I will give credit where it is due (sorry Mr. Biden I will still vote for you). In case you didn't pick up on this in paragraph 1 straighting is when you have a same sex best friend who you talk to so much they might as well be your boyfriend. Although I wanted to make fun of my friend I knew that I was guilty of straighting as well.

My best friend in college and I were horrible straighters. We talked about 8 times a day. We were always at each other's apartments. We also really didn't make any decisions without consulting the other. I used to tell her I would be calling my boyfriend had I had one, but since I didn't I call her. I would say straighting is a great alternative to actual dating. No feelings, no weirdness, no jealousy, it's perfect...except for the lack of booty I suppose (I mean if you're into that sort of thing).

I would suggest straighting to anyone out there who is sick of the opposite sex or if you just like your bestie more than most of the boys/girls that you meet. Although your friends might think you're weird...or gay, they just don't understand the completely natural, oddly close relationship that warrants constant contact and confiding in your same-sex but totally straight best friend. And you know what they don't have to get it because you already have all you need.

Dedicated to Shan, my bestie.

On being dumb...

I can't believe it's been a month since my last blog...sorry folks or rather Audra, my only fabulous friend who reads this. ;) I have been pretty busy working a full time job, working a part time job, and trying to study for the GMAT. The GMAT, the very thing that brings me to the subject I shall write about this evening.

Being dumb is a many splendid thing. I feel as though when you are told your whole life by your parents that you are smart it is an an abrupt and painful process to learn that you are actually quite dumb. I feel betrayed, lied to, mocked...( I know these are redundant). My dad is a smart man, my sister is a smart lady, my mom is a smart mama, and they are also all liars. They all convinced me that I was smarter then all the rest of the kids, even the kids that got better grades then me. I wasn't at the top of my class because they tried harder, not because they were smarter. Ha!

Why do you put yourself down Julie? (This is what I assume you are asking me) And I say because public...it's true. As I study for the GMAT and read each painful line of sentence correction it all comes through loud and clear. I know NOTHING about the English language. Not only that, I also can't find an average, multiply a fraction, or discover a pattern in a group of numbers.

I wish I could blame it drugs or government testing, but sadly I have never been an addict or a test subject. I am just naturally this way I suppose. I didn't study in college, I didn't study in high school and this has all led to a blowing discovery at the ripe old age of 25 that I am a moron. Now, now I know that intelligence comes in many different packages. I am smart at people or common sense or something like that right? Wrong. I am completely and utterly average in every way. I think I am okay with it though. I mean I don't really have any other choice so I might as well accept it.

Fear not public this will not deter me from making everyone listen to my opinions, read my blog, or leaving hateful anti-Palin messages on my facebook status. I just want you to know, that i know, I am dumb. Thank you for reading this completely average blog.