Blogology

Since I started this blog I have wanted to add the word blog into my vocabulary in anyway I can, so that everyone I speak to remembers to read my blog. This is a continuation of my previous post of making up words. I have taken this to another level by making up words and incorporating the word blog into them in some way. Go ahead try it...

Blogtastic was my first one, it just means fabulous blog. Blogology, as I titled this post, is the study of blogs. Blogimosity, is animosity between blogs. Blowl (feautured to your left), is an owl featured in a blog (or a movement *wink wink*). You get the idea. You should begin using these words with all of your friends too and then get them to read animalslovesnacks.blogspot.com as well. :)

Making up words or Wordocology

Word play is so tricky these days. Everyone always trying to outsmart each other with bigger and better words. Does anyone really remember more than three of their ACT/SAT words? And then the there's the GRE you are forced to memorize all these damn words when honestly...who EVER uses those words?? There's a reason college educated adults don't know the meaning of them either.

Well, I've taken on a different way to impress people...I like to make up my own words; however I base them on real words, so that people don't really know if they're words or not. Now, some of them are easy to figure out like the made up word, "douchy." (Sorry mom, but I do say that word). It means jerk or "douchebag" like. That one is an easy one, but a word like "animotic," seems to fool people pretty well or they give me a face, but since they don't really know for sure they say nothing and wait until later to pull it up on dictionary.com, only to realize of course that I made it up. (By the way it means to be done with animosity). I made up the word because I didn't have any other word to say that really described what I was trying to get across, so I made them up. Now, most of you might say well then perhaps you should get a bigger vocabulary. Well, why on earth would I do that when making up words is so much fun? Most of the time people don't want to seem stupid so they don't question your made up words if they are good enough. Most people can't really correct you (unless you're Dave Rukavina (my dad) and then you don't have a problem knowing obscure words), because even if they think the word is wrong they're not certain, so they say nothing. I am not saying that I would be able to figure out if someone made up a word when speaking to me. That's the beauty of it, everyone confusing each other all the time. It's a wonder we all feel stupid and just watch "Who wants to be a Millionare," in order to feel smart, because who doesn't know all of the answers to that show?

And for the people that use those big words and do know what they mean...well you need a hobby.

P.S. When I spell checked this my made up words got highlighted and I felt so proud. If you have any words to add please leave comments, because I'm always looking for more made up words to use on people.

Mini Instruments...for mini people?

Yesterday as I was walking through the West Village I passed this tiny store with tiny instruments in it. My first thought was, how does this store afford to stay open only selling tiny instruments? My next thought was, who plays these tiny instruments? They are too small for "little people," too big for Barbie, animals don't have opposable thumbs with which to pluck an instrument. Hmm...I just didn't know. Then I had an epiphany! These were knick knacks or tchotchke's, if you will. It's ridiculous that it took me so long to figure this out since I am the knick knack princess (second only to me mum). Then I thought, why wouldn't you want a tiny instrument to prove to all of your friends that you, in fact, play a larger version of this same exact instrument! I mean I actually wouldn't want a small violin or piano, but maybe that's because of the shame I bear from quitting so many music lessons as a child.

Why do people like such mini things? Why do people insist upon buying a small viola if they already have a life size one that actually serves a purpose? I suppose I could just ask my mom (who I am pretty sure has given my sister a miniature viola at one point or another), but I think she would just say she didn't know why. Why do we really buy anything we do? I love buying mini things. I love buying mini plates and glass thimbles from everywhere I go and they are just as useful as a tiny piano. I suppose I think they will conjure up some memory each and every time I look at them, even though they really don't do that at all. Now they just take up space on my bookshelf where my books should really be. Does this mean I will stop buying them? No, probably not. I will, probably, forever think that I need to buy miniature things to commemorate each and every thing I do in life. So if you see a little plate that says "I like to buy miniature plates," let me know and pick one up for me.

New York, New York

As many of you know I live in the big apple, New York City. I pay astronomical rent, so that I can live in a very small space, have hobos hang out outside my window, pay $8 for a box of ice cream sandwiches (which I resist doing), ride cramped subways and get yelled at for no apparent reason at any time. All of this does come with some good though. Last night my friend Val (who consistently gets me to do fun New York things) asked me to go see the NY symphony orchestra play in Central Park for free. Although part of me wanted to go home because I knew I had some episodes of Jon and Kate Plus 8 to catch up on (I blame my aunt and uncle for introducing this show to me), I decided that I would take Val up on her offer. Luckily her fabulous roommate, Andrea, decided to save seats for us because by the time we got there there were thousands of people already there. You know, when I was younger we used to go to Theatre in the Park during the summer (if you're from Kansas you will know what I'm talking about). I thought Theatre in the Park was so cramped and there were so many people there, now I think that was child's play. At any rate, besides a woman passing out and falling on the ground about 10 feet from us, the concert was great. The weather was really nice, I managed to stay away from the ice cream cart, and the music was beautiful. Then as we all get up to leave I remember why I hate free events in New York...the mass amount of people.

New York City would be great if it just had about half the people it does now. There are people everywhere all of the time and when you add the word "free" onto anything that means everyone shows up. Now this venue was on the Great Lawn in Central Park, so it wasn't quite as bad as it could've been. People were pretty nice and since it wasn't too hot no one was miserable, but still trying to weave through people just to get out of the park was a pain and I was even on foot! I will say this experience was about a million steps up from the last free thing I tried, which was attending the opening of the Apple store on 14th st in the middle of winter.

I'm not sure why I thought this would be a good idea. I'm also not sure why I decided that on a Friday night I would want to head to the grand opening of an Apple Store alone. This is probably a good summation of my NY life in general...me, alone, on a Friday night in the freezing cold with the hobos. Anytime you say free in this city you will automatically get an eclectic mix of trashy people in NYC (no, I am not excluding myself from this crowd). Trashy means very different things to different people, but in this case I just mean rude and manner-less. I figured since it was nighttime the line wouldn't be long and I could just go in win me a brand new MacBook Pro (which I do need a new computer) or maybe an ipod for my Dad or something. I get there and I see that the line is long, but I figure it will go fast. Even though I had my thickest winter coat on I still froze my butt off. Then these lovely young girls in front of me that had a very small infant in a very large stroller decided to let me know that i was too even with them in the five-person wide line and they needed to announce that they were in front of me and I should back up (they didn't say it nicely either). Typically I would've been sassy back or maybe questioned them as to why they thought it was a good idea to bring a small child out in the bitter cold, so that they could maybe win an ipod or something, but instead I just kept my mouth shut and nodded. Three hours (no joke) later after listening to the Long Island teens behind me talk about their social life (which was way more "active" then mine in more ways then one) I got to the front of the line. Ironically right as we approached the doors the baby in front of me starting crying (probably because it was near frozen) and the young mothers had to stop and pull out a bottle, so I ended up in the store before them anyway.

As I walked in the staff cheered for you as if you were Ed Koch, they handed you a tube that determined if the last three hours had really been worth it after all. I stared at the tube intensely hoping to burn a winning sticker into the underside of that cap with my brain power. I found a little niche in the store where I could stop and discover my fate. As I began to pull the little plastic top off I held my breath, turned it over, and realized that I had just frozen my toes and wasted my Friday for a $10 itunes gift card. Then I looked up and saw what looked like a homeless man walking out of the store with a brand new macbook. I did a quick lap of the store and it had the same crap every other Apple store did and retreated home to my warm apartment.

I know, I know, he needed the laptop more than I did, but still it burned a little bit. I waited all that way, suffered through the incessant chit chat of grossly "mature" teenagers, just to get a poster and a gift card. It was further prove that my Grandpa was right when he used to tell me "nothing is free." He should've added to that...especially in New York.

My June reading.

Originally I wanted to start a blog so that I could write about book reading, because it's one of my favorite things to do. Now, I'm not sure if anyone will actually read this, but in case they do I will blog about the last couple books I have read.

Book 1 Alan Greenspan. Although it took me a long time to get through I found it to be very informative. It was long and boring, but it had lots of good stuff in it even for someone with limited economic knowledge like me. The first half he discusses his life and where he came from, how he got to the position he's in now etc. The second half goes over about every major country's economic woes and then some. I learned a lot and probably missed out on a lot of information because of my inability to remember numbers or statistics. I would recommend this book, but it is dry and it takes a while to muddle through all of the information thrown at you. It's also a little scary as you see where our economy is headed, but it's also hopeful because Greenspan reminds us that every recession brings with it growth...it just might take a while.

Book 2 "A Church in Search of Itself" It is a book about the Catholic church's hierarchy, the progressions it's made (or hasn't made), the problems within, and a good look at the past and present Pope. Overall I enjoyed this book, I liked reading about something I really didn't know all that much about. I am Catholic so I knew the basics, but I didn't know anything about JP 2's background and knew even less about Pope Benedict. The author was also a former Jesuit so he wasn't attacking the hierarchy as many do, but there's a certain amount of history that needs to be understood as to why the church sometimes acts the way it does and he definitely had that knowledge. He gave some great insight into how things operate and the sad direction the church might be headed if it doesn't start to catch up the ever changing society it's very own members live in. I can't say I'm a big fan of Pope Benedict after reading this, but I'll keep those opinions to myself and allow you to read the book for yourself.

A tribute to the one and only Amy Sedaris (applause)

As I mentioned in the above posting I love Amy Sedaris. I sometimes get bored at work and search youtube for her appearances on late night TV. Creepy? Maybe, but I like to think of it as furthering my creative spirit. Today I found some things about her.

1. Jerri Blank (from Strangers With Candy) is based on a real person. She is based on Florrie Fisher an actual user, boozer, and loser. She was a promotional speaker in the 70's and oddly enough ended her life in mystery as she was believed to have fallen back to her old ways, but no one really knows for sure. It is her lovely face that adorns the heading of my delicious blog.

2. Animals love snacks...a for real deal quote she said while on an episode of Letterman a couple years ago.

2. David Letterman loves having her on his show.

3. She makes Martha Stewart uncomfortable and anyone who can do that is a friend of mine.

4. She used to have a fake boyfried named Ricky, but he was tragically fake murdered.

5. She is in a rabbit society and owns a rabbit named Dusty (he is real).

6. She used to have a fake monkey named Pockets, but he was too troublesome.

I think that's it. I know many of you may be a bit put off by my love for Ms. Sedaris, but rest assured it's a healthy admiration for a very creative and funny woman.

Animals Love Snacks

So I begin...a few times in my life I have been told to write a book or something of that nature, so this is it. Although this is no book I feel like it's the lazy man's book...a blog. I will begin by talking about myself, because that's what blogs are all about. Blogs to me are to make people feel self important by dedicating one whole web page to themselves where they hope people will come and read what they have to say, then if it's any good they will go around to all of their friends and talk about how funny, sad, or pathetic your blog sounds compared to their 2nd cousin's blog. Now, that being said I hope mine is JUST as pathetic as the next person's and that will now be my goal.

I was actually going to start this blog months ago, but in my typical Julie fashion it took me a while to do it. Why am I so lazy you ask? I'm not sure I like to tell my crazy Christian friends it's just the way God made me and for my agnostic heathen friends I will just say because I am and I like it, so get off this. I hope this blog will capture my humor, wit, personality, quirkiness, and most of all humility. I will be guided by the things that I like to write about...so mostly me, but maybe I'll talk about squirrels, owls, snacks, family, books, bad TV, bad politics, Amy Sedaris, dating associates, regular associates, hobos, hookers, and bums (especially the ones that hang outside my apartment). I feel like I have so much catching up to do!

My friends tell me that I tell them the same stories over and over again and although I have no idea what they're talking about this will be my chance to just tell the story once and let everyone I know (because they will all be reading this) read the story on me blog.

I will begin by telling you about myself. I like fatty snacks. That ranges from tortilla chips to peanut butter. I have one very funny sister that inspires much of my humor and two parents. They are funny sometimes too, but not always on purpose. They are great and supportive parents though and I love them lots. I have a delightful group of close friends that make my life great and keep me in line along with a few very close friends that I couldn't get along with out. I live in the city of ill repute known as New York City and sometimes work in TV and documentary film making. I wish that I was motivated enough to make my own documentary, but instead I just work on other people's great ideas. I like awkward humor and poop jokes, but I don't often laugh at your average comedian's jokes. I am sensitive, caring, and a bit obsessive...okay a lot obsessive. I love and hate people all at the same time. I talk too much, have too many opinions that change on a daily basis and I am extremely passionate (about certain things). I watch way too much TV, but I also read a lot. I feel like a good dose of Tolstoy can balance out Rock of Love 2. I think this may be me in a nut shell, but when do people actually have an accurate view of who they are? I will end with sometimes on this blog I will try to be funny and fail...so just let me know when I suck.

Oh yes! The title is a quote from Amy Sedaris, but it is true animals do indeed love snacks...and so do I.